George Carlin Songs

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Complete list of songs by George Carlin.

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  1. 15 Rules to Live By
  2. 20th Century Hostilities
  3. 40 Years in Comedy
  4. 400,000 American Musical Favorites
  5. A Couple Of Other Questions
  6. A Few More Farts
  7. A Few More Oxymorons
  8. A Modern Man
  9. A Moment Of Silence
  10. A Name by Any Other Name
  11. A Place for My Stuff
  12. A Place for Your Stuff
  13. A Proposition
  14. Abortion
  15. Acknowledgments
  16. Action 6 News
  17. Activists
  18. Advertising Lullaby
  19. Advertising Lullabye
  20. Advice
  21. Air Pollution & Seven Things I'm Tired Of
  22. Airline Announcements
  23. Airline Flight Attendants
  24. Airlines
  25. Airport Security
  26. Al Gore's Actions
  27. American Bullshit
  28. An Incomplete List Of Impolite Words
  29. Angels
  30. Another Objection on Language
  31. Another Problem for Women...
  32. Answering Machines
  33. Anything but the Present
  34. Appropriate Names
  35. Asshole, Jackoff, Scumbag
  36. Asylums
  37. Autoerotic Asphyxia
  38. Avant Garde Play
  39. Baby Slings
  40. Baseball And Football
  41. Baseball - Football
  42. Battered Plants
  43. Be Well
  44. Beliefs
  45. Birth Control
  46. Birthday Party
  47. Black Consciousness
  48. Blind Girls
  49. Blue Food
  50. Bodily Functions
  51. Body Curiosity
  52. Breakfast Wine And Who's Boss
  53. Britain's Return of Hong Kong
  54. Bullshit
  55. Bumper Sticker
  56. Burns & Carlin
  57. Business 10 Steps
  58. Businessmen
  59. Camcorder
  60. Canadians
  61. Capital Punishment
  62. Capt. Jack & Jolly George
  63. Captain Jack & Jolly George
  64. Cars And Driving
  65. Casual on a Cell Phone
  66. Cats & Dogs
  67. Channel 7 Editorial
  68. Childhood Cliches
  69. Children
  70. Children Are Our Future
  71. Cigars
  72. Class Clown
  73. Clerks, Hankies and Emma
  74. Closing
  75. Coast-To-Coast Emergency
  76. Colon Powell
  77. Comedy and Pain
  78. Comedy's Evolution
  79. Comitting the Perfect Double Murder
  80. Commercials
  81. Confession
  82. Cookies
  83. Countryside Battles
  84. Cute Little Farts
  85. Daytime Television
  86. Dead Parents Helping
  87. Dear Friend
  88. Death
  89. Death And Dying
  90. Death Penalty
  91. Deaths of Supercelebrities
  92. Debbie's Checkup
  93. Deceased
  94. Declare War
  95. Divorce Game
  96. Do, Take, Have, Give
  97. Dogs & Forever
  98. Dogs Come in All Sizes
  99. Dogs Don't Care
  100. Dogs on TV
  101. Domestic Terrorism
  102. Don't Pull The Plug On Me
  103. Don't Say to a Comedian
  104. Drinking and Driving
  105. Driving
  106. Drugs
  107. Dumb Americans
  108. Early Boarding
  109. Early Influences
  110. Earrings
  111. Ed Sullivan Self Taught
  112. Elmo's Song / Johnny Badcheck
  113. Entertaining a Four Year Old
  114. Entropy & Disorder
  115. Euphemisms
  116. Euphemisms 2
  117. Euphemistic Language
  118. Every Child Is Special
  119. Expressions
  120. Extreme Human Behavior
  121. Eye Blaster
  122. Falling Asleep
  123. Familiar Expressions
  124. Family Newsletters
  125. Farting In Public
  126. Favorite Period of Time
  127. Fear Of Germs
  128. Feminist Blowjob
  129. Fifth Announcements
  130. Filthy Words
  131. Fire Dept. Tip
  132. First Announcements
  133. First Leftfielders
  134. First Time Funny
  135. First Time Human Sacrifice
  136. Five Twos
  137. Flesh Colored Band-Aids
  138. Flying
  139. Food Terms
  140. Football Cheers
  141. For Name's Sake
  142. Forward / Rice Krispies
  143. Fourth Announcements
  144. Fourth Leftfielders
  145. Free Breast Examinations
  146. Free-Floating Hostility: Quote Marks in the Air / Badda-Boom, Badda-Bing / Bad Hair Day / I Heard That / My Needs Aren't Being Met / Mickey Mouse's Birthday / The Two Pandas in the Zoo / Sperm/Egg Donors, Etc. / Innocent Victims / Personal Bottle
  147. Free Speech
  148. Fuck You, I Like These Kinds of Jokes
  149. Fun You Can Have
  150. Fussy Eater
  151. Gay Lib
  152. George Carlin Book Club
  153. George's Disc Jockey Theme and Show Opening
  154. Give a Hoot
  155. God
  156. God Bless America
  157. Goin' Through My Address Book
  158. Golf Courses For The Homeless
  159. Good Bye
  160. Good Ideas
  161. Good Sports
  162. Goofy Shit
  163. Graceful Death
  164. Grandchildren
  165. Grass Swept The Neighborhood
  166. Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread
  167. Groups And Charities
  168. Guacamole
  169. Gun Enthusiasts
  170. Guys & Dolls, Part 1: Ladies First
  171. Guys Named Todd
  172. Handicaps / I'm Tired
  173. Hands-Free Telephone Headsets
  174. Harley Davidson
  175. Have A Nice Day
  176. Head Blew Up
  177. Headlines
  178. Heavy Mysteries
  179. Hello-Goodbye
  180. Henry the VIII
  181. Herb Coolhouse
  182. Heroes Who Died for Their Country
  183. He's Smiling Down
  184. Hi Mom!
  185. High On The Plane
  186. Hitchhiking (long version)
  187. Hitchhiking (short version)
  188. Hobos
  189. House Of Blues
  190. How to Handle a Heckler
  191. How's Everybody Doin'?
  192. How's Your Dog?
  193. I Ain't Afraid Of Cancer
  194. I Can't Recall
  195. I Like People
  196. I Love My Dog
  197. I'm Musical
  198. I Used To Be Irish Catholic
  199. Ice Box Man
  200. Icebox Man
  201. In A Coma
  202. Instructions
  203. Interview With Jesus
  204. Intro
  205. Introduction
  206. Irish Guys
  207. It's Your Body-Fearless Fashions
  208. Jesus Christ
  209. Join The Book Club
  210. Just Before You Die
  211. Just Enough Bullshit
  212. Just For Fun
  213. Keeping People Alert
  214. Kids And Parents
  215. Kids and Parents: Children Are Overrated / They're Not All Cute / They're Not All Smart / Too Much Safety / Guns in School / School Uniforms / Kids Who Smoke / Anal Parents
  216. Kids Are Too Small
  217. Killer Carlin
  218. Landmines
  219. Language of Comedy/Goodbye
  220. Last Meal
  221. Latest Disaster
  222. Left Wing Non-Sense
  223. Legal Advice
  224. Lenny Bruce
  225. Let's Beat Them With Our Purses!
  226. Let's Make A Deal
  227. Letter to a Friend
  228. Life's Little Moments
  229. Little Moments
  230. Little Things We Share
  231. Locations
  232. Losing Things
  233. Losing Your Place
  234. Lost & Found
  235. Love And Regards
  236. Man Stuff
  237. Man Stuff: Slugfest / Cut-Off Sleeves / Barbed Wire Tattoo / Lead, Follow or Get Outta the Way / Police Sensitivity Training
  238. Meaning of Life
  239. Mental Brain Thoughts
  240. Mental Hot Foots
  241. Minority Language
  242. Minority Language: Happens to Be / Openly / Urban / Girlfriend
  243. Missing
  244. Modern Man
  245. Monopoly
  246. More Euphemisms
  247. More Random Thoughts (Peacekeeping Force)
  248. More Redundant Expressions
  249. More Shorties
  250. More Stuff On Cars & Driving
  251. Mort Sahl
  252. Mother's Club
  253. Moths
  254. Motivation Seminars
  255. Mr. Policeman
  256. Muhammad Ali: America The Beautiful
  257. Music On Answering Machines
  258. My Childhood
  259. "My Daddy"
  260. My Dog
  261. Names
  262. NASA-Holes
  263. New Hostility Scoreboard
  264. New News
  265. New Sports
  266. New York Voices
  267. News Descriptions
  268. News Report Death of Humpty Dumpty
  269. Nice Days
  270. No Brown in the Rainbow
  271. No Complaining About Politicians
  272. No More Old People
  273. No One Questions Things
  274. Nursery Rhymes
  275. Nuts in Cake & Toenail Clippings
  276. Observations
  277. Occupation: Foole
  278. Offensive Language
  279. Old Fashioned
  280. Old Fuck
  281. Old Time Radio Favorites
  282. On The Road
  283. One More Thing You Don't Need
  284. Opening
  285. Opening Squence
  286. Opposed to Singing
  287. Orchestra
  288. Organ Donor Programs
  289. Organ Donors
  290. Pandas
  291. Parents' Cliches And Childrens Secret Answers
  292. Parents In Hell
  293. Parents Of Honor Students
  294. Peace on You
  295. Peas
  296. People I Can Do Without
  297. People Refuse To Be Realistic
  298. People Who Misuse Credit Cards
  299. People Who Oughta Be Killed: Self-Help Books
  300. People Who Want to Know the Time
  301. People Who Wear Visors
  302. Person To Person
  303. Physical Carlin
  304. Point of View
  305. Polically Incorrect
  306. Politically Speaking
  307. Politics
  308. Poor People
  309. Popular Beliefs Rooted in Familiar Expressions
  310. Posthumous Female Transplants
  311. Preface
  312. Prerequisites
  313. Problems and Issues
  314. Proud To Be An American
  315. Public Affairs
  316. Pyramid Of The Hopeless
  317. Quicksand
  318. Quotes and Stuff
  319. Radio Dial
  320. Radio/TV Interviews
  321. Rain. Dances. 007
  322. Raisin' A Child Is Not Difficult
  323. Raisin Rhetoric
  324. Random Thoughts (Recreational Drugs)
  325. Rants
  326. Rape Can Be Funny
  327. Reagan's Gang, Church People, And American Values
  328. Reality Shows
  329. Regional Differences
  330. Reincarnation (Souls)
  331. Religion
  332. Religious Lift
  333. Religious People
  334. Reporting a Bombing
  335. Respect
  336. Restaurants
  337. Retail
  338. Retired People
  339. Rice Krispies
  340. Rich Guys In Hot Air Balloons
  341. Rip-Offs
  342. Road Rage
  343. Rockets And Penises In The Persian Gulf
  344. Rules, Rules, Rules!
  345. Sacking a City
  346. Safety Tips
  347. Sanctity Of Life
  348. Sandwich
  349. Saying 'Hello'
  350. Scab
  351. Schmucks
  352. Second Announcements
  353. Second Leftfielders
  354. Secretary of Being in the Closet
  355. Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television
  356. Seventh Announcements
  357. Sex & Violence
  358. Sex Facts From Thailand
  359. Sex In Commercials
  360. Shitty Music
  361. Shoot
  362. Short Exchanges
  363. Short Jokes
  364. Silence
  365. Singers With One Name
  366. Sixth Announcements
  367. Snapper Lawn Mowers
  368. Snot, The Original Rubber Cement
  369. Social Situations
  370. Some People Are Stupid
  371. Some Werds
  372. Son Of Wino
  373. Special Dispensation: Heaven, Hell, Purgatory And Limbo
  374. Sports
  375. Sports Is Big Business
  376. Sports Roundup
  377. Standing Alone
  378. State Prison Farms
  379. Store Clerks
  380. Structuring the Act
  381. Stupid Bullshit
  382. Stupid Bullshit On The Phone
  383. Supermarket
  384. Supermarkets
  385. Swearing On The Bible
  386. Takin' Off Yer Hat
  387. Tattoos
  388. Teenage Masturbation
  389. Telephone Mimes
  390. Television Announcers
  391. Tell Claus I Said, 'Hello'
  392. Telling Time
  393. Terrorism
  394. That's a Fine Howdoyado
  395. The 11 O'Clock News
  396. The All-Suicide TV Channel
  397. The Big Change
  398. The Business of Comedy
  399. The Coney Island Recordings
  400. The Confessional
  401. The Cool World
  402. The Evening News
  403. The George Carlin Book Club Offer No.1-How to Titles
  404. The Hair Piece
  405. The Hallway Groups
  406. The Indian Sergeant
  407. The Laughter Reflex
  408. The Male Disease
  409. The Metric System
  410. The New Zodiac
  411. The Newscast
  412. The Opening
  413. The Original "Person To Person"
  414. The Planet Is Fine
  415. The Prayer
  416. The 'Pre' Epidemic
  417. The Red Sox (Socks)
  418. The Self-Esteem Movement
  419. The Sickest
  420. The Suicide Guy
  421. The Ten Commandments
  422. The Vegas Incident
  423. The Writer
  424. Their Kids!
  425. There Is No God
  426. They're Only Words
  427. They Want To Show You The Pictures
  428. Things To Watch Out For
  429. Things We Say When People Die
  430. Things You Don't Wanna Hear
  431. Things You Never Hear
  432. Things You Never See
  433. Third Announcements
  434. Third Leftfielders
  435. Thoughts
  436. Thoughts & Facts
  437. Three Little Words
  438. Timing & Delivery
  439. 'Tippy'
  440. Today's Professional Parents
  441. Toledo Window Box
  442. Traffic
  443. Traffic Accidents–Keep Movin'!
  444. Trying Stuff Out
  445. Tumor Humor
  446. TV Crap
  447. TV Tonight
  448. TV Tonight: Playboy Channel / Jerry Springer / Little House on the Prairie / Willie Nelson
  449. Ugly Singers
  450. Ugly Women
  451. Unrelated Things
  452. Urinals Are 50 Percent Universal
  453. Usage
  454. Values (How Much Is That Dog Crap in The Window?)
  455. Vitamins
  456. War
  457. War Pictures
  458. Warm and Cold
  459. Wasted Time
  460. Wasted Time: Sharing A Swallow
  461. Watch Your Mouth
  462. Water Sez
  463. We Control Your Lives
  464. Welcome To My Job
  465. Well, Ya Gotta Live Someplace
  466. What A Phone Call Should Be
  467. What's My Motivation
  468. When I Was Young
  469. White Guys Who Shave Their Heads
  470. White Harlem
  471. Who's the Boss
  472. Why We Don't Need 10 Commandments
  473. Wishing Wells
  474. Wonderful WINO (Top 40 Disc Jockey)
  475. Words
  476. Words We Leave Behind
  477. Writing Techniques
  478. Wurds
  479. Y'ever
  480. Yeast Infection
  481. You & Me (Things That Come Off of Your Body)
  482. You Have No Rights
  483. You're Lost
  484. Zero Tolerance
  485. Zones

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